In This Together: Eight Ways Dads Can Support New Moms
Congratulations on the arrival of your bundle of joy. Becoming parents is a transformative experience, but it is also immensely challenging. However, it is even more overwhelming for the new mom. Recovering from childbirth, adapting to sleepless nights, and navigating the challenges of caring for a newborn can take a toll. During this time, dads have an incredible opportunity to provide meaningful support. By stepping up and taking on an active role, you can help ease her transition into motherhood.
Here are eight practical and impactful ways to support the new mom in your life.
1. Take Charge of Nighttime Feedings
Newborns feed frequently, often waking every few hours during the night. This can quickly become exhausting for new moms, especially if they’re the only ones tending to the baby. Dads can make a big difference by taking over some of the nighttime duties.
If your baby is bottle-fed, step in to handle one or two nighttime feedings. This gives your partner a chance to sleep for longer stretches, which is essential for her physical and emotional recovery. Even if she’s breastfeeding, you can support her by burping the baby after feeds, changing diapers, or simply being there to offer encouragement during those late-night wake-ups.
2. Care About Her Rest and Comfort
Rest is integral for post-partum recovery, but it’s often hard to come by with a newborn in the house. You can help the new mom get some rest. A comfortable sleep setup can go a long way in helping her get the quality rest she needs.
If your current mattress isn’t doing the job, consider upgrading it. Tempur-Pedic mattresses, for instance, are designed with advanced features like memory foam comfort layers and customizable firmness, which support proper spinal alignment and reduce pressure points. These features can help alleviate back pain and improve sleep quality, even if the hours of rest are fewer than usual.
Beyond upgrading her sleep environment, create opportunities for her to nap during the day. Offer to take care of the baby for a while so she can rest without interruptions. Small gestures like these can have a big impact on her recovery and well-being.
3. Be Her Emotional Anchor
The post-partum period can be an emotional rollercoaster. Hormonal changes, sleep deprivation, and the all-new responsibility of caring for a newborn can lead to mood swings, anxiety, or even post-partum depression. During this time, being emotionally available is one of the most valuable things you can do for your partner. Listen actively and without judgment. Let her share whatever she’s feeling, whether it’s about exhaustion, fears, or even her joys.
4. Handle Household Chores
When a new baby arrives, the list of daily responsibilities grows longer, but your partner’s capacity to manage them diminishes. This is where you can really help the new mom by taking charge of household chores.
Start with the basics—cooking meals, washing dishes, doing laundry, or vacuuming. Keeping the house in order gives her one less thing to worry about and allows her to focus on recovery and bonding with the baby.
Be proactive. Don’t wait for her to ask for help. Look for what needs to be done and take care of it. This kind of initiative shows that you’re fully invested in your family’s well-being.
5. Encourage Her to Take Breaks
Motherhood is a full-time job, but no one can give their best if they never take time to recharge. Encourage your partner to take breaks and focus on herself, even if only for short periods.
Offer to care for the baby while she enjoys a solo walk, takes a long bath, or catches up on her favorite show. Remind her that taking care of herself isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. When she’s refreshed and relaxed, she’ll have more energy and patience to care for your little one.
6. Learn Baby Care Skills
You’re both new to parenting, and you’ll have to learn a lot together. New moms often feel like they must take on the majority of baby care tasks because they’re unsure if their partner is equipped to handle them. As a dad, taking the time to learn essential baby care skills can relieve her of some of that pressure and foster a sense of partnership.
Learn the basics, such as how to change diapers, prepare bottles, bathe the baby, and swaddle. Practice soothing techniques like rocking or gently bouncing the baby, and get comfortable with putting your newborn to sleep. This is also an opportunity to bond with your child.
Don’t wait for your partner to ask for help—step in and show initiative. The more confident you become with baby care, the more she’ll feel comfortable sharing responsibilities.
7. Celebrate Small Wins
Parenting is filled with little victories that deserve recognition. Whether it’s the baby sleeping through the night for the first time or your partner mastering a challenging aspect of breastfeeding, celebrating these moments can boost her confidence and morale.
Let her know you notice and appreciate her efforts. A simple “You’re doing such a great job” or a heartfelt note can make her feel seen and valued. On tougher days, remind her of how far you’ve both come together. These small gestures of acknowledgment can have a profound impact on her emotional well-being.
8. Be Proactive, Not Reactive
When it comes to supporting a new mom, anticipation is key. Don’t wait for her to ask for help or to tell you what she needs. With mood swings, post-partum depression, and hormonal imbalances all taking a toll along with the responsibilities of a newborn, you have to be patient with her. Instead, pay attention to her routines and find ways to make her life easier.
For instance, if she’s breastfeeding, keep her water bottle filled and ensure she has snacks nearby. If she looks tired, offer to take over baby duties so she can rest. Take note of recurring tasks, like diaper changes or bottle washing, and handle them before she even notices they need to be done.
Being proactive shows her that you’re attentive and invested, which can ease her mental load and make her feel like she’s not in this alone.
The Dream Team
Supporting a new mom is about being present, thoughtful, and proactive in your actions. Parenthood is a journey that’s best navigated as a team. Your willingness to share responsibilities and provide emotional support will not only make her transition into motherhood smoother but also strengthen your relationship. In these early days, your actions will lay the groundwork for a stronger family bond, showing her that you’re truly in this together.